Journey?

It is one lazy afternoon here where I am now. It's been a long time since I've written an entry so I decided to write one this time.  I'm sure my followers, which number to errrr about 3, are curious to know how I'm doing here.  Let me get to that in a while.  Before anything else, I would want anybody reading this now to take a 5 second pause.  Think of where you are now, how far you've gone, who are you with through all of this and where you are going in this journey of life....Erm, your 5 second ain't up yet but well okay here we go.

I've been away from home for almost a month.  Even in that so short a time, it feels like years.  Gone from mind is the school I used to work in, the places I regularly go to, people I regularly see.  I haven't had a beer in almost a month.  Surprisingly,  I am not craving it.  Maybe, it's because of the weather. Maybe it's because I don't have anyone to share it with.  I wanted to buy a six-pack and bring it home, but I don't think I would enjoy drinking it here on my own.  You see, I live alone.  I live in a quaint and cozy apartment with a small swan lake behind it, surrounded by a cover of trees.  The place is as pretty as it can be.  Not fantabulous but it'll work for now.  I don't have friends to see, friends who live nearby or people I might consider friend material.  I don't want to be too clannish but I do want to have a Filipino friend over here.  Sadly, I don't.  And for now I have to grin and bear it.

It was naive of me to think I'm not gonna have it too hard over here.  I was wrong, I was dead wrong.  Everything here is just a lil bit out of touch from me, from what I know of, from my culture.  Everyone around here is just a lil bit colder than the people I am used to dealing with.  Every person here is so self-absorbed with their own lives, I don't think they make real connections with people they meet around them.  But that's about it, I probably am misjudging them just because I find it hard to get around the place, the people and the system.

I walk my way to work and to the grocery.  So you might say pretty much, I ain't goin anywhere. I don't have a car cause I don't know how to drive so I just do whatever it is I have to do.  So I walk.  I walk for about 15-20 minutes to work.  Here is a view of the trails I have to pass to go to work.

This is right outside of my apartment complex.

After going straight ahead I had to turn and make a shortcut through this trail over here.  And then I walk on the side of the highway precariously watching out for crazy drivers.



In the mornings, I usually bring a hot mug of coffee with me, sipping slowly to keep me a lil bit warm on the way to work.  And then after that I grind for eight to nine hours, go home and pretty much do the same things over and over again.  It is straining you know, you get to work, letting time fly by so you could get home and pretty much do nothing to do the same thing over again tomorrow.  You look forward to the weekends which is just about as dull as any other day, except that you can sleep longer and do no patients.   It is not fun here I am telling you.

I understand now that it is harder to have the world bend around you than you bending around it.  I have always prided myself that I can.  But in here I feel helpless.  I can't do much because I can't go anywhere without a car and without a real friend.  I am not sad mind you.  But I am somewhat lonely.  You know that feeling that you seem stoned and the time just passes by without you making real lasting memories?  You become automatic, doing things just because you have to not because you want to.  What I want right now is a cold bottle of beer and a nice light chat in my own native tongue and somebody worth sharing a drink with.

Life is hard, they say.  It is only now that I know what it meant.  Don't worry about me though.  I get by.  Just think of this as my incubation period before I release the true form of my virus.  Nyahaha.  Till then, America, watch out!